Me, myself, and everybody
So here I am sitting in my hotel room in San Francisco on Day 4 of a business trip. Just me, myself and I. And boy am I bored. It's fairly ironic. As a parent I often find myself wishing for even a moment of privacy. I've found myself contemplating driving to the nearest gas station so that I can use the restroom in peace. And now I've hit the jackpot. An entire week to myself! and I just realized that this is not what I wanted.
There are so many things that are made better by being with someone else. I've ran into numerous situations this week where I've missed having someone to share them with. For example, I went to a local burger joint, got my order and went to sit down at a table by myself. The dining experience is not meant for one person. For starters, even the smallest table has two chairs. Then, a few minutes into my meal I had to use the men's room and as I stood up I found myself wondering how the bus boy would know that I'm coming back. I had no way to signal to the restaurant that the table was only temporarily unoccupied, that I was coming back for the last few bites of the burger and the rest of the fries and please don't clean up my lonely little table just yet. I nearly decided to take my tray in with me before I finally settled on finishing eating first (ever tried eating and doing the potty dance at the same time?) and then going.
Being by myself for most of the week has helped me realize something that the Lord already knew. "It is not good that man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18). Now I realize that taken in context this scripture specifically refers to the companionship of a husband and a wife, but simply taken at face value we can learn a valuable lesson. We know that the purpose of our life on earth is to be tested and to prove our willingness to obey the commandments. Normally when you take a test you do it alone. Cheating and getting help from another person is discouraged. But life is not a normal test. It literally takes everything we have, and guess what. We're not supposed to do it alone. We need to help others, but just as importantly we need to be helped by others.
There is a reason that addiction recovery programs always employ some sort of "sponsor". It's critical to have someone you can call when you feel pressure to relapse. Other people can help. They can give advice, or provide a new perspective, or simply distract you until the urge subsides. We are a social species and can only reach our true potential with the help of others.
I realize that not everyone chooses to be alone. Sometimes it seem like circumstances conspire to isolate us. Being alone is not part of God's plan for us. Loneliness is a tool the Adversary uses to disconnect us from others. Sometimes not being alone takes effort on our parts. As I looked around the restaurant for a place to sit that night, I wasn't the only solo diner there. I choose to sit by myself, but I could have just as easily made another choice.
A long time ago the Apostle Paul wrote a letter in which he made the following statement:
"Therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God"
I certainly felt like a stranger and a foreigner in this little restaurant in San Francisco, miles away from my home and family and friends, but should we ever feel that way? Paul didn't think so, and neither does the Lord. We are all children of our Heavenly Father and we have a responsibility to make sure nobody feels alone. I love the phrase "no more strangers". How would the world change if there were no more strangers? How much better could we make people's lives if we knew things about them and cared about them.
Instead of sitting down by myself to eat in peace, I could have solved my loneliness issue by simply asking someone if they would mind some company. And it's entirely possible that I may have solved their loneliness issue too.
This is something that I struggle with. I don't open up to new people very quickly. I'm shy and self conscious and I try too hard to make sure people like me. But that's no excuse. I need to be better. I need to follow Paul's counsel and reach out to those around me. I need to say Hi to people standing in line next to me. I need to get to know my neighbors better.
I hope that you'll all join me and work towards creating a world in which there are no more strangers.
There are so many things that are made better by being with someone else. I've ran into numerous situations this week where I've missed having someone to share them with. For example, I went to a local burger joint, got my order and went to sit down at a table by myself. The dining experience is not meant for one person. For starters, even the smallest table has two chairs. Then, a few minutes into my meal I had to use the men's room and as I stood up I found myself wondering how the bus boy would know that I'm coming back. I had no way to signal to the restaurant that the table was only temporarily unoccupied, that I was coming back for the last few bites of the burger and the rest of the fries and please don't clean up my lonely little table just yet. I nearly decided to take my tray in with me before I finally settled on finishing eating first (ever tried eating and doing the potty dance at the same time?) and then going.
Being by myself for most of the week has helped me realize something that the Lord already knew. "It is not good that man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18). Now I realize that taken in context this scripture specifically refers to the companionship of a husband and a wife, but simply taken at face value we can learn a valuable lesson. We know that the purpose of our life on earth is to be tested and to prove our willingness to obey the commandments. Normally when you take a test you do it alone. Cheating and getting help from another person is discouraged. But life is not a normal test. It literally takes everything we have, and guess what. We're not supposed to do it alone. We need to help others, but just as importantly we need to be helped by others.
There is a reason that addiction recovery programs always employ some sort of "sponsor". It's critical to have someone you can call when you feel pressure to relapse. Other people can help. They can give advice, or provide a new perspective, or simply distract you until the urge subsides. We are a social species and can only reach our true potential with the help of others.
I realize that not everyone chooses to be alone. Sometimes it seem like circumstances conspire to isolate us. Being alone is not part of God's plan for us. Loneliness is a tool the Adversary uses to disconnect us from others. Sometimes not being alone takes effort on our parts. As I looked around the restaurant for a place to sit that night, I wasn't the only solo diner there. I choose to sit by myself, but I could have just as easily made another choice.
A long time ago the Apostle Paul wrote a letter in which he made the following statement:
"Therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God"
I certainly felt like a stranger and a foreigner in this little restaurant in San Francisco, miles away from my home and family and friends, but should we ever feel that way? Paul didn't think so, and neither does the Lord. We are all children of our Heavenly Father and we have a responsibility to make sure nobody feels alone. I love the phrase "no more strangers". How would the world change if there were no more strangers? How much better could we make people's lives if we knew things about them and cared about them.
Instead of sitting down by myself to eat in peace, I could have solved my loneliness issue by simply asking someone if they would mind some company. And it's entirely possible that I may have solved their loneliness issue too.
This is something that I struggle with. I don't open up to new people very quickly. I'm shy and self conscious and I try too hard to make sure people like me. But that's no excuse. I need to be better. I need to follow Paul's counsel and reach out to those around me. I need to say Hi to people standing in line next to me. I need to get to know my neighbors better.
I hope that you'll all join me and work towards creating a world in which there are no more strangers.
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